For the past few days I have been bombarded with the (very excessive) exposure of true love and soulmates.
Anna and Christian, Carrie and Big, Hazel Grace and Augustus, Blair and Chuck, Summer and Fling?
Perfect pairs, no matter where I go (okay, maybe not the last one). Soulmate: the one, the “we were made for each other”, the one true love, the HIM… the soulmate.
For those who have found them, good for you. For those who haven’t, you’re not alone… And yes, I am starting to be skeptical about this whole idea too.
While you do hope for the best for yourself to find the same happiness these fictional charters have, you can’t help but say, “They’re not even real and yet they’re happier than me!” And if THE ONE does come along, will it really be better than what we see in movies?
The concept of soulmates: is it a dream waiting to come true or is it just a dream?
What happens to those who never meet the one but live waiting for him or her? Do we chose our soulmates or has destiny chosen them for us? What if your soulmate gets run over by a bus? Does that mean you no longer have one? Or maybe he was never the one in the first place. What if you already met the one but you guys didn’t hit it off right? What if you’ve already met your the one but he already met his? What if you’ve already met the one and he lets you go? What do you do then? Are you soulmate-less forever? Do you die alone soulmate-less? Do you marry someone else just because you don’t want to be alone and rob someone of their soulmate? What happens to them? Is the plan of nature, destiny, and the stars then ruined if you marry the wrong the one? What if you were arranged to a marriage, is he your soulmate? What if he just said you were soulmates and you bought it even if he wasn’t your soulmate?
The more I question this theory on soulmates, the more it doesn’t add up. The numbers of What Ifs that come to my mind hatch like goblins in the rain!
But the more I think about it, the more evident it becomes to me that the concept of soulmates, while it may seem magical, traps us into feeling like we’re not enough to make ourselves happy if we don’t have THE ONE. And while I do love fairytales as much as the next 1990s kid, I do wonder where did the “I don’t need a man to make me happy” fairytales go? (Special Mention to Mulan… Who also met Shang)
What happens to those who don’t meet their soulmates? Is the idea of soulmate another idea of “The Spark”? Something couples say to each other just to make the relationship more special? Is it even real?
What if the one didn’t exist? What if when you were born, God forgot to make your better half? Does that mean you’ll be 1/2 of a person forever? See? The more you question this theory, the more ridiculous it sounds… or the more ridiculous I sound.
To the people who haven’t met their soulmates: Have we given up, are we waiting, or are we simply bitter?
What if the one was a pair of Christian Louibuions? Or that orange Birkin? What if God didn’t forget to make your other half because he knew you didn’t need one but you just think that you do?
I can never really answer these questions, neither can you (if you can, call me. We need to talk). What if you don’t need a soulmate?
And while I resign myself into the idea that I do not long for a soulmate, I do know what I need a solemate. I need a good pair shoes to protect and put me on the pedestal from the soles. In short, I know that I don’t need anyone to make me happy, to make me whole, to make me feel like I’m on top of the world. I need myself, a handful of good,kick-ass people, and a closet of shoes to make me happy. You need the same thing, yourself, a handful of good,kick-ass people, and whatever it is that makes you happy and makes you feel passionate.
I wanted to introduce to you the idea of solemate: a love story about yourself. Before you call me narcissistic, it about learning to love yourself first and doing something you love to make you happy. It’s about being on your feet and looking for that adventure that makes you complete, weather it be with people or just yourself. It’s loving yourself enough to make yourself happy, from sole to soul. For the outside to the inside, from the heels to the sneakers, from the sole to the soul. Why would you need a soulmate if you can’t even make your soul happy? Soul and Sole are now two of my favourite words. They mean so much without saying much.
And what if that soulmate does come along? Then good for you, you get two love stories and he will love you body and sole. But if it’s anything, don’t wait for the one. If destiny is panned out as it says, you will meet them but don’t wait for them. Don’t waste your time waiting for something that might not come or something that already has but you missed it.
Wearing my heart on my sleeve to my sole.